You know, it occured to me what the problem is with that whole Datebook scenario. It's a mentality of scarcity. That same mentality is what leads to food hoarding in co-ops; if we get fresh orange juice Friday evening, don't plan on having it with breakfast on Saturday. Everyone hurries to drink it as soon as it arrives because they want to get some before it's gone because they know everyone else is doing the same thing, so self-fulfillingly it runs out.

I think this sort of "economy of scarcity" thing underlies a lot of big problems in the world today: oil prices, agribusiness, jealousy in relationships, Dungeness crab fishing, the backlash against gay marriage, and of course my struggle to enjoy the Chronicle.

Of all the things that the world is short on--food? oil? peace? love?--time to read the newspaper shouldn't be one.
- posted by k @ 1:10 AM

 
One of my few pleasures in life is the Chronicle Datebook section. I don't care what you think of the Chron; the datebook and a cup of tea is how I can unwind and keep in touch with things I really care about, like this year's programming changes at the San Jose Ballet.

Of all the Datebooks, the Friday Datebook is Queen. It's the longest, which means to really enjoy it with a cup of tea you need a commuter mug or thermos to keep the tea hot. Furthermore, it contains Jon Carroll (he's only 3x/week now), the newish series of columns by Jean Gonick that I routinely enjoy, pages and pages of movie reviews, as well as those old standbys, Leah Garchik's "The In Crowd," that old crackpot "Dear Abby" and of course, the comics.

I usually read the Datebook in a certain order. I read the least interesting/desirable features first, saving the comics for last. I don't read all the articles, but more often than not, I find an average of 2-3 interesting and read them through. Sometimes I just read the half that's on the front page and decide that I don't feel the need to root through the paper to find the rest, and that's ok. But the crucial thing here is the worst-first, best-last strategy. This same strategy is also executed in the microcosm of comic reading; I read from the bottom up, skipping Boondocks and Get Fuzzy for last, and since Doonesbury, Foxtrot, Sally Forth (shut up, I like Sally Forth) and For Better or for Worse are near the top anyway, they're also near the end.

My ex-girlfriend used to ask me "What's the point of that? What if something happens before you get to the end and you never get to read the ones you like? Why even bother with the ones you don't like?"

I had no answer for her. She clearly did not understand The System. Such things cannot be explained.

And yet, now I find myself questioning The System. You see, several days in the last 2ish weeks, I have not managed to read the Datebook on the day it arrives. Usually this is not a problem; I can catch up the next day. However, the skank-ass idiots I live with can't seem to figure out the very simple newspaper rotation and recycling program we have, so I have been having trouble staying current with the Datebooks. Unfortunately (or fortunately?) I have had many Friday evenings lately which have required me to not be at home until the dining room has been cleaned and the newspapers have been dealt with. Missing the Friday Datebook is not a good way to start the weekend.

Today I *did* manage to get my hands on the Friday Datebook, even though some maladroit pig's daughter had ineptly shoved it inside the "Bay Area" section of the paper. I took it to my room, to savor with a cup of tea. But I couldn't savor it. I read quickly through Dear Abby, Ms. Gonick and Mick LaSalle's review of "The Endless Sunshine of blah blah blah" I haven't yet read Jon Carroll or the comics because I had to stop and blog this.

I do seem to be shifting my strategy, but I don't see it as an improvement. I think reading the paper as if you would die before you got to the comics is a saaad indicator of quality-of-life. Something fundatmental has been lost. No one will recognize this tragedy until it is too late. And then, of course, it will be too late.
- posted by k @ 12:28 AM

 
If I can't be a cat or a Vulcan, can I be a neurolinguist? They seem ok.
- posted by k @ 12:05 AM

 
I have decided that if I can't be a Vulcan, I'd like to be a cat. But Vulcan is still my first choice. I hope my application goes through.
- posted by k @ 9:32 PM

 
Friday Five for Friday 3/5/04 from Melissa:
"Who are your top 5 fictional crushes?"

1. Captain Kathryn Janeway. It is *not* about Kate Mulgrew, trust me. It's about the Captain.
2. Jo from Little Women. Predictable, I know. There’s a reason she and Laurie were only friends. I'm still sure that German guy she married was just "beard." I even read Little Men and Jo's Boys in futile hope...
3. Jadzia Dax. I didn't follow DS9 closely, but when I did watch it I hoped to see Jadzia because she seemed like strong, intelligent, interesting woman--and hey! She's in the alpha quadrant. I think they just married her to Worf to kill the rumors. And then they killed her off, anyway. Kira Nerys was hot, too, but I think I would have gotten along better with Jadzia.
4. Someone from DTWOF, maybe Ginger.
5. I don't know...maybe Dr. Franknfurter?

Runner up: Captain Jean-Luc Picard; He would be #2, but I think some of that really is about Patrick Stewart and not just about Captain Picard.
I think that many celebrity crushes probably qualify as "fictional crushes" on account of what you're crushing on is most likely a somewhat fictional persona. I mean, you don't really know Tom Cruise (gag). What you have a crush on is a fictional persona created by PR agents and papparazzi and in the case of actors conflated with roles they have played.

The other Friday Fivers:
Melissa, Adam, Merideth, Will, Gina, Gord, Adrienne, Marvin, Rob, Laura, Jon, Ritu, Julie, Morgaine, Rik, Fionna, Ray, and Mojave Sixty-Six.





- posted by k @ 1:49 PM